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Posts Tagged ‘nurturing children’

Raising a Child With a Backbone

Tuesday, March 9th, 2010

Calling out all moms today on this sunny crisp Tuesday morning. Greetings ladies! Hope you all celebrated your womanhood yesterday.

If there is anything I am on the fence about, it’s the topic of nurturing… too much vs. too little. Encouraging our kids vs. being tough on them when needed.  Aah, the joys of parenting and all the confusion that comes with it! Providing for your children’s physical needs, like food, clothing and shelter, is pretty straightforward. However, providing for your children’s emotional needs is an entirely different beast. Every child is different, and you probably see it in your own house, that your nurturing style differs with each child based on their character. I can throw my three year old into pretty much any new situation, and he’s off with a big smile. My big son is cautious, sometimes hesitant, and asks MANY questions about anything new. But my confusion always comes in the form of: Do I nurture right now or should I be tough right now?

parenting

I have been guilty of hugging and kissing my kids while they’re misbehaving. Now I know what you’re thinking… I’m soft and a pushover. I’m actually not. I have little tolerance for rudeness, and I won’t raise a quitter. But, I see how when one of my kids gets jealous or threatened, for example, they act out. So instead of throwing them in their room for misbehaving, I hug them, because I see they’re suffering at that moment. I take them and I ask them quietly, “Tell mommy what’s wrong. Why is it hard for you right now that you had to hit your brother.” My husband thinks I’m totally wrong and will send them to their room, to create the backbone. I try and address why they acted up in the first place. Two different styles. Thanks goodness they have the balance!

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