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Posts Tagged ‘Motherhood’

Hangovers N’ Hockey

Monday, January 23rd, 2012

I almost feel like this would be the name of a great blog. Yes, a blog about the musings of a beer drinking, ass-kicking hockey team– you know, HangoversAndHockey.com. But sadly, no. You’re still at WomenOnTheFence.com. It’s still the same me– the same go-getting, inspirational diva, just wrecked after a weekend of over-drinking and over-arena attending. But hey, what would life be like if you ONLY walked a straight line, right?

Friday night marked the beginning of a big intercity hockey tournament weekend for my 8 year old son. It was again, another weekend that our family would NOT be skiing, and would not see the light of day. We’re talking 2-3 games per day if the team advances through the rankings. See right there, I’m already starting the weekend a little p-‘d off. The ongoing argument every weekend goes something like this:

Me- WE MUST SKI.

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Wisdom Wednesday: When You Thought I Wasn’t Looking

Wednesday, December 14th, 2011

Our school principal sent this in this week’s newsletter. I think it’s magic.

“I want to take this opportunity to remind us all, that to our own children, we are their role models and heroes. They look to us for guidance, support, encouragement and love. Children are always learning from the adults around them as the following poem so eloquently states:”

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you hang my first painting on the refrigerator and I immediately wanted to paint another one.

When you thought I wasn’t looking, I saw you feed a stray cat and I learned that it was good to be kind to animals.

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The Trick of Boundaries and Rules with our Daughters

Monday, October 18th, 2010

By Guest Blogger  Susan Shapiro Barash

Susan with her two daughters, Jennie and Elizabeth

As I listened to the voices of a variety of mothers this past year and investigated why mothering daughters today seems more arduous, more difficult than ever, I couldn’t help but think of my own daughters and the pitfalls and rewards of raising them.  As they grew up – today they are 23 and 30– I often struggled with the ‘right’ answers to their requests.

Should I have allowed a curfew that made me worry for hours, just because my older daughter, at 15 pleaded with me and claimed that “all” her friends had the same late curfew?  Should I have said no when she wanted her ears pierced at eight, which felt too young and somehow not appropriate? Not only did I say yes to this, but when my younger daughter wanted her ears pierced at seven, I agreed, figuring that this daughter was immersed in a much slicker, faster world than her big sister, seven years older, had experienced.

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The Tortoise and the Hare

Tuesday, July 13th, 2010

“You can have anything you want – if you want it badly enough. You can be anything you want to be, do anything you set out to accomplish if you hold to that desire with singleness of purpose.” –Abraham Lincoln

I’d like to dedicate today’s post to all the mothers and their children. Today’s post came about as a result of my monthly girls’ dinner that I attended last night. As always, every month, we shoot the breeze over some good food and booze, and chat about everything from current events (Hello psycho Mel Gibson), to the development of our kids. Nine girls catching up is always… well… LOUD.

ladies dinner

So over at my end of the table, we were discussing how each of our kids are enjoying the summer and camp so far. I talked about how my boys are having truly the best summer of their lives. We’ve really turned the corner. My big son doesn’t cry anymore when he leaves (took him forever to separate from me), and my little son jets off to camp like he owns the place. They’re swimming, playing tennis, soccer, basketball, arts and crafts, skating, golf. You name it. They have a great dad (cuz yes honey, you don’t ever deny them anything when it comes to exposing them to new experiences). They’re lucky.

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Denise Richards & A Call To Action

Monday, June 21st, 2010

It all started with a Facebook status update. I had left my Facebook page open on our office computer Saturday afternoon, and my husband sat down to check the daily sports stats online.  “Come quick” he said, “You have to see this.” He then pointed to one of the status updates in my account. “Look at this 7 month old puppy Golden doodle. He is going to be killed in a shelter on Monday if they can’t find him a home.”

This was the tiny picture posted with the message.

dog shelter

OMG, I thought. Always a dog lover and one to lend a hand if I can, I immediately wanted to help.

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Raising a Child With a Backbone

Tuesday, March 9th, 2010

Calling out all moms today on this sunny crisp Tuesday morning. Greetings ladies! Hope you all celebrated your womanhood yesterday.

If there is anything I am on the fence about, it’s the topic of nurturing… too much vs. too little. Encouraging our kids vs. being tough on them when needed.  Aah, the joys of parenting and all the confusion that comes with it! Providing for your children’s physical needs, like food, clothing and shelter, is pretty straightforward. However, providing for your children’s emotional needs is an entirely different beast. Every child is different, and you probably see it in your own house, that your nurturing style differs with each child based on their character. I can throw my three year old into pretty much any new situation, and he’s off with a big smile. My big son is cautious, sometimes hesitant, and asks MANY questions about anything new. But my confusion always comes in the form of: Do I nurture right now or should I be tough right now?

parenting

I have been guilty of hugging and kissing my kids while they’re misbehaving. Now I know what you’re thinking… I’m soft and a pushover. I’m actually not. I have little tolerance for rudeness, and I won’t raise a quitter. But, I see how when one of my kids gets jealous or threatened, for example, they act out. So instead of throwing them in their room for misbehaving, I hug them, because I see they’re suffering at that moment. I take them and I ask them quietly, “Tell mommy what’s wrong. Why is it hard for you right now that you had to hit your brother.” My husband thinks I’m totally wrong and will send them to their room, to create the backbone. I try and address why they acted up in the first place. Two different styles. Thanks goodness they have the balance!

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Can Women Have It All?

Tuesday, January 19th, 2010

Of course women CAN’T have it all! You tell me one person who has absolutely everything! Perfectionism is an illusion of the mind. Today’s Blog post is about the women who try and have it all, and then go into therapy when they realize that it’s virtually impossible.

perfection is a myth

Over the past few decades, women have made incredible strides. We make up half the US workforce, and are holding some of the highest level positions in the country. However, if I show you studies of female executives who seem to have it all.. marriage, kids, great career, money, 87% of them are considering making a life altering change.  Eight seven percent! Studies show that these women are craving more balance, more home time, and are leaving corporate America in numbers to either stay home, or start their own businesses.

So, let’s first take a look at what it means to have it all. To me, Oprah represented having it all. A dream job, power, success, friends in many places. But then I got married, got barfed and shat upon (is that a word??), and realized, Oprah’s missing a major component. She never married or had kids amidst all her success. She probably has very little “me” time, little privacy, maybe even suffers from feelings of isolation at the top, amongst others.  Okay, this is one example. I would still like to reiterate, however, that Oprah remains my hero and my number 1 (Ellen, you’re number 2!)

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