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Posts Tagged ‘mother daughter relationships’

Guilty Part II

Friday, February 5th, 2010

I first want to apologize for not having added more meat to this week’s blog posts. As you know, I started writing the book this week, and I’ve been trying to catch my breath, and figure out how to juggle the book writing, the blog writing, and the website upgrade all at the same time. I’ve really had very little time for anything or anyone this week, it’s been all about the work. But I look at it as a short term sacrifice, and then things should settle down a little. So I’m full speed ahead for now, with severe cramps in my fingers from typing so quickly, because the thoughts come to me at such a rapid rate, I want to get them all in the book. It’s been interesting. I haven’t worked this hard in a long long time, to be honest.

writing a book

All this writing has kept me quite isolated, quite tired and a little more away from the kids than I’m used to. All this to say, I’m feeling the guilt. Oh the guilt. What a crappy feeling.  I’m having major flashbacks of the time when my stress level was at a feverish pitch, right before I sold my business, and my son would look at me and say, “I miss you mommy. How come you’re leaving again?”  So,  I would like to give a “HOLLA” (yes, that’s the sort of thing Jay Z and 50 Cent shout out at the Grammy’s), to my wonderful MOTHER. She has been my saving grace for the past two weeks when things started to get very hairy. She has been there to help out with the kids, and to nurture me emotionally. When the kids are with her, or my mother in law, I never feel guilty. I can work with a clear head. I’m lucky to have these ladies in my life.

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Life Interrupted

Friday, November 13th, 2009

By Guest Blogger Melanie Kramer

I must admit, writing this Blog post was cathartic, liberating and at the same time overcast with a shadow of somberness. The last six years have been a struggle coming to terms with my decision to give up a painting career that I loved dearly, to stay home and raise my children.  And as I reflect back today, I can’t help but think, “Was this the best decision for me? For my kids? Why do I feel like I am on the road to nowhere?”

Growing up, I watched my mother obsessively clean the house and do the laundry. I watched her go to the dry cleaners and the grocery store. Her life seemed so consumed with daily housework that even though she was a stay-at-home mom, I felt forgotten. I also felt her sadness and saw her frustration. Did she really choose this life for herself willingly? Ever since I can remember, I promised myself that I would never let myself turn into my mother.

Let me also give you some work history… ever since I was small, I was taught that you go to school, get your degree and get a job. I never knew you could turn the things you love into your life’s work. I took dance lessons and many art classes. I loved being creative, but those were the things I thought were just hobbies. So after going the traditional route, I received my degrees in both Psychology and Social Work and worked with children in schools and hospitals. While I did enjoy it, I knew that this was not my destiny.

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