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Archive for the ‘Sex & Sexuality’ Category

Behind Closed Doors: I Married a Sex Addict

Tuesday, January 31st, 2012

While I realize that not everyone is facing this issue, and while the topic may not have the usual “mass appeal,” it is quietly going on behind closed doors in many homes around the world. Today, I wanted to crush the shame, and help those who might be suffering.

Erica

By Guest Blogger Paldrom Collins

When I first met the man who is now my husband and he told me that his work was counseling men with sexual addiction, I remember clearly the feeling of wanting to stick my fingers in my ears while loudly shouting “la-la-la-la.” That was quickly followed by the immediate conclusion that this man was not someone I would want to talk with ever again. But life as a jokester led me to want to get to know this man, even with a career that was initially oh-so-embarrassing to hear about. And it didn’t end there. I soon learned that not only did George counsel sex addicts; he was a recovering sex addict himself.

Sexual addiction is a compulsive sexual behavior that dominates an addict’s life, taking priority over work, friends, and even family.

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Four Things You Should Know About Men

Thursday, November 24th, 2011

By Guest Blogger By Eric J. Leech

Men don’t like to talk about themselves much. For this reason, many of their idiosyncrasies are largely left a mystery. Today, I am pulling back the curtain, revealing the delicate balance of what separates a man from the boy. Whether you are married, in a relationship, navigating dating websites or the bar scene, these four tips will help bring new understanding to what you already thought you knew about men.

Women On The Fence readers, here is a private viewing, a sneak peak into our minds….

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The Perks of Dating (And Flirting) At Forty

Friday, October 7th, 2011

By Guest Blogger Amy Larson

It feels like just yesterday I was wearing big hair, jelly shoes and bracelets, rolled sleeves on my jacket, and running around with boys that turned up their collars and wore football jerseys in town on the weekends. How did I wind up sitting at a Mexican restaurant next to a mature gentleman with touches of silver around his temples, on my first date in NINETEEN years? It was beyond bizarre.

No dreaming of a white dress and a huge wedding; I’ve already done that and so has he. Neither are wondering what a child would look like if we had one together; our child-bearing eras are over. He’s not sweaty and nervous when he kisses me or asks me on a date; anyone single and older than forty generally knows what they’re doing. Not only has he asked hundreds of women out in his lifetime, he’s also popped the question a time or two. While I had once dated boys, dating an actual ‘older’ man, one with a deep voice and the ability to grow a full beard is both thrilling and strange. This guy has a job, a mortgage, ex-wives, grown children and even a grandchild. What am I doing?

As a dating-happy teen, I could just grab my (Guess) bag and run out the door. At age forty and divorced, it’s getting home from work exhausted and bewildered at the mess early-morning dashers left behind, then rides to sports practices and slapping dinner on the table before I can even think about that night’s wardrobe or what I’m going to do with my hair.

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Sexual Dreams

Friday, July 8th, 2011

By Guest Blogger Layne Dalfen

Why We Dream About Sex

Have you ever dreamt about having sex with your best friend? Or dreamt about sex with a hot stranger, perhaps while lying in bed right next to your partner?! How does this dream make you feel when you wake up? Aroused? Uncomfortable? Guilty? All of the above?

It’s not surprising that of all the dream topics I analyze with clients, sex dreams top the titillation–and confusion–charts. The way we dream about sex can uncover our deepest secrets about ourselves helping us problem-solve and offering critical guidance on important life issues. You just need to know how to deconstruct them. Discovering why you had a particular dream is an investigation. You’ll want to ask yourself questions to solve the puzzle. Remember that in our dreams we are decision-making, testing out different solutions to our problems. We are practicing different behaviors. And all of the possible ways of behaving in every situation we face are there for us in our dreams. Why feel stuck with the same reactions to situations over and over again when our dreams offer us the potential to change our behavior and our lives?

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Weinergate and Cybercheating

Friday, June 10th, 2011

I really wanted to blog about the current events surrounding Congressman Anthony Weiner. Yes, THAT Weiner who showed HIS Wiener on Twitter and then lied about it. But then I reconnected with one of our amazing previous Guest Bloggers, Kiri Blakeley, who has been covering all things Weinergate. And I think she did a better job than me.

I really wanted to pose this question to you: IS SEXTING AND CYBERSEXING WITHOUT PHYSICAL CONTACT, ACTUALLY CHEATING?

By Guest Blogger Kiri Blakeley

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Scheduling “Date Nights”

Monday, April 25th, 2011

When Jacqueline Elman pitched me on this topic a few weeks ago, I honestly wasn’t sure if if you ladies would go for it. But then, I thought “Hey, let’s bring the cat outta the bag and (in the words of Linda Richman), talk amongst ourselves.”

Still in my Mike Myers, Linda Richman New York accent,  “I’ll give you a topic. Would you pencil-in and “schedule” sex in your marriage? Discuss.”

By Guest Blogger Jacqueline Elman

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When Your Man Has Been Living A Double Life

Tuesday, April 12th, 2011

By Guest Blogger Kiri Blakely

One night five years ago, I was getting ready for bed. It was about 11 p.m. My fiance, Aaron, whom I’d lived with for ten years, was in the living room. I could hear Sex and the City droning on the television.

“Kiri, come here,” he said, softly. “We need to talk.”

I padded into the living and plopped into a chair across from him. For an instant, it occurred to me that he might be about to tell me something horrible, but I just as instantly dismissed the thought. When you’ve lived with a man for a decade, you reside in a peaceful place of complete confidence that you know him thoroughly.

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