Today’s Blog Post was sort of like a joint effort between myself and the yummy mummies at the local Second Cup Cafe. It all started with my girlfriend, who met me for a coffee after school drop off. “What are you writing about today?” she asked. “Not quite sure. Was thinking about Cougars. What do you think?” I replied. In no time, we had about 5 women there, all throwing ideas my way, me typing as quickly as I could. I know why I never go to that particular Cafe to write. It’s VERY distracting. But FUN!

In case you haven’t yet heard the expression, a ‘Cougar’ is a term for an older woman who seeks out and enjoys the company of a younger man, while still enjoying her independence. Think Demi Moore, Madonna, Mariah Carey. The intentions of a “cougar” can range anywhere from chasing after a young boy-toy for fun outings and sexcapades, to someone looking for a loving and committed relationship.

Demi Moore & Ashton Kutcher
Demi Moore & Ashton Kutcher

When I think of a Cougar, I think of those Real Housewives of Orange County. Is that what the show is called? I have never seen one episode in my life, but I envision these women who have been sucked and tucked, furs, jewels and martinis, chasing after these hot younger guys. And I think, there’s a lid for every pot! Why would some young gorgeous guy wanna be with an older woman (unless of course she looks like Demi Moore)?

Now, it’s always been socially acceptable to see older men with younger women. This we know. But when an older woman is seen with a younger man, she gets labelled “Mrs. Robinson” or a “Cradle Rocker.” But times they are a changing, friends! These Mrs. Robinsons are more and more prevalent today in society, and it is really become socially acceptable. ABC even has a new hit “Cougar Town,” starring Courtney Cox.  The “older” or more mature woman is a lot stronger than she used to be. She is more independent and confident than ever, and she doesn’t give a shit what the neighbors say about her younger man. She is looking to make herself happy, and rightfully, she should.

Courtney Cox in Cougartown
Courtney Cox in ABC's Cougartown

So I ask you again– why would a man want to date a woman 10 or 15 years older than him? Well, some studies reveal the following:

“Some young men are attracted to an older woman’s maturity and the fact that older women seem more comfortable with themselves. Older women have lived more and are more established; they can take care of themselves and don’t rely on a man to take care of them. Younger men are attracted to the fact that older women act more mature and seem to be less materialistic than younger women. Mature women don’t mess with their heads and play mind games with them, acting coy and shy one minute, the next minute mouthing off and being bossy.”

Okay. Interesting.

So, as I’m sitting here with my girlfriends writing about cougars, the hottest young guy is serving me and my girlfriends some nice hot lattes. My girlfriends already know this guy, “John” we’ll call him. He’s supposedly one of the reasons my yummy mummy friends come to this place for coffee. Well, not the only reason, but I get the feeling they like being served by him, if you know what I mean. And I gotta tell you, he’s quite dreamy (and his lips are luscious). And he can’t be older than 21!!!  One of my friend’s husbands repeatedly says to her, “Why do you go to Second Cup, their coffees are $4.00? You told me McDonalds is offering delicious coffee for free.” To which she replies, “Until my hot younger barista is servin’ coffee at McDonalds, I ain’t goin’ anywhere.” Cute.

friends drinking coffee

Another mummy here has given me an example of a cougar (one of her best friends). Here is the friend’s story: Perfect couple. High school sweethearts. They get married. Have kids. He forces her to move out of the city to suburbia around two years ago. All of a sudden, he starts acting strange (he had been the perfect husband up until then). She grows suspicious and starts following him around. She catches him in an affair. She confronts him. He says he’s not happy. He leaves her. She goes through a six-month depression. Then, just as she’s finally getting her groove back,  she meets this twenty-something guy online. She is 35. She falls head over heels in lust with him. They start having mind blowing sex. In fact, she told my friend, she didn’t even know what sex was until she met this younger guy. She has him sneaking into her house at wee hours of the night, cuz of her kids. Completely happy and satisfied. However, lately, this lust has progressed into something deeper. And, he has started coming around on Saturdays to hang with her and her kids.  The girls here talked about how she finally got off the fence. She had to shit or get off the pot. They were going to move forward, or the fling was going to end. So far, it’s going. So I say, “Good for you Suburbia Cougar!!”

And like I’ve said before, who are we to judge anyone’s relationship? After all, isn’t age just a number?

Until next time my fellow readers,

xoxEDxox