The 5 Stages of Grief

September 29, 2014 5 Comments TAGS: Relationships, Stress

Happy Monday, girls! We’re back in the groove today. The kids finally went back to school after last week’s Jewish holidays, and I went back to the gym (five pounds heavier due to endless chopped liver, brisket and gefilte fish).

You might recall one of my favorite guest bloggers on this site, Janet Tarasofsky. Her post titled 525,600 Minutes to Single Motherhood began like this:

Single mothers are created in all different ways– some through divorce, some by choice and some by pure chance.  I struggle to decide exactly which category I fall into… perhaps you can help me to decide?

Single-mother-Ella-Scott-001

The year is 2004 and I was living in London working for a very large company, when suddenly my amazing boss was abruptly fired and asked to leave the building. I was devastated and I began to re-evaluate staying within a large, cutthroat company without my boss.  It didn’t take long to reach the decision to change jobs.  Thankfully, after some searching, I found a promising new job.

But before resigning, I decided to take a holiday.  I booked a 2-week trip to Nepal where I would spend one week meditating in a Buddhist monastery, meditating, and another week in a 5-star hotel, relaxing.

There is 347,200 minutes left in the year, I’m in Nepal and I’m meditating with 50 people from around the world, when I start to feel extremely nauseous.  I run to the most prehistoric toilets you have ever seen (which does NOT help), and stay in there for about an hour before I manage to crawl back to my room, and wait for whatever horrible bug I have to pass.

But after 4,500 minutes, I realize that it is not passing!  I have not eaten anything in days and I decide that it is time to see a doctor. I leave the monastery and go to the hospital in Kathmandu. After some basic tests, the doctor speaks the words that will change my life forever: Janet, you are not sick, really. My dear, you are pregnant.

keep-calm-because-you-re-pregnant

After 3,000 minutes, I regain my ability to speak, and I immediately start thinking: OMG! OMFG! This can’t happen to me! I am about to start a new life. A new job!  Having a kid is not part of the plan… Especially because I do not have a boyfriend!

I book myself on the first plane back to London, where I intend for this nightmare to end. But then I have this sudden realization: I have never been pregnant before, and I am 32. What if this is my only chance?  Within a split second, I know for certain that I am going to have this child.

When I get back to London, I make 3 very difficult phone calls…

To read the rest of the entry, click here: http://womenonthefence.com/2013/08/28/525600-minutes-to-single-motherhood/

Janet recently shared a talk with me on the 5 stages of grief when recovering from a bad breakup. And why I am sharing it is, while you may not be going through a breakup of your own, perhaps you CAN identify with wanting to return to yourself after a difficult period, or longing to get your groove back.

It’s a heavy topic for a Monday, but hey, let’s dive in and watch, shall we?

I’d love to know your thoughts on Janet’s 5 stages of grief.

Erica3

    5 Comments

    1. Lainey says:

      What a strong and intelligent woman you are. Inspiring sorry.

    2. Brenda says:

      Great video Janet. As a single mom myself you hit the nail on the head.

      • janet says:

        Thank you Brenda. I hope that sharing a bit of my life can help others to connect. Its a tough world out there but no one said we cant have a good laugh. JT x

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