Dealing With the “Boss from Hell”

October 7th, 2009

We’ve all heard of ‘em… THE BOSS FROM HELL! Screaming and yelling in an open office environment… placing unrealistic expectations on employees… taking credit for the success and accomplishments of others… constant criticism and denigration of employees… working employees until all hours of the night… lack of appreciation. The list of goes on and on.

Perhaps you’ve had one in the past. Perhaps you’re dealing with one now. Regardless of your current situation, bosses are a part of life, and if you’re lucky enough to have a great one, GREAT FOR YOU! If you are like the majority of the population who hate their bosses, “welcome to the club,” as they say.

Now I have to say, I haven’t been too unlucky in this arena. I worked a few part time jobs during college, and my bosses were all pretty okay (plus or minus a bitchy one in clothing retail). The bosses in my full-time job after college were pretty nice too (plus or minus some of the annoying schtick they had). But I know a lot of you have not been so lucky in this department, so I needed to address it, and get you off the fence.

To get off topic for a sec, I had a funny encounter with one boss I thought I’d share. It was a business trip to Boston, and we travelled as a group of 6 women. The company policy was two in a room, and lucky me, the boss put me in her room!!

I’ll never forget, we worked all day from 7am to 11pm. I was so tired, I just wanted to be alone by the end of the day. I couldn’t stand the idea of working with people all day and then having to be nice and make small talk again in the evening.

Anyhow, it was 11:30PM, I had already washed up in the bathroom. I was now sitting watching TV on my double bed in a pair of pj’s I had purchased for the trip. For those of you who don’t know, I sleep in the nude 365 days a year, so I had to buy something respectable for the trip… I was sharing a room after all! So here I am, in my cozy flannels pyjamas, and out walks my boss from the bathroom…. IN A SILK NEGLIGEE! Pink with lace! I’m dying people! She walks over to the bar fridge and pulls out a bottle of sherry and starts drinking at 11:30PM! “Would you like some?” she asks. I couldn’t contain my embarrassment! Who does this? Negligee and sherry at 11:30 at night with your employee??

Top that off wither her snoring. She frikkin’ snored all night long! I actually cursed at her “stop fucking snoring” I yelled out of desperation some time around 3:45am. I was tired, I just wanted some sleep!

I’m sure most of you have some funny stories as well, to offset those hellish ones! But, back to the boss.  Going to a place you spend most of your waking hours should not be a place of abuse and belittling. You should be able to spread your wings at your job, not worry about a boss trying to clip them.

So what do you do if you are living with a boss from hell? With the economic times as they are, find a truly satisfying job with good pay can be quite challenging as well. It’s a bit of catch 22, but I’m going to try and help you at least make the best of the hand you are currently being dealt.

  • Make a list of the all the things your boss does that drives you bananas. That make you scream. Sit on the list for a few days, and come back to it to add more or delete key points. Once your list is ready, schedule a meeting with the hellish boss. Perhaps even meet outside the office environment, over coffee or breakfast. Leave your own emotions at the door, but definitely be prepared for your boss to blow off steam once you tell them just how hellish they are. Maybe, just maybe, your boss hasn’t fully realized his/her actions and how they have been hurting you. Honesty is always the best policy here. And there’s always a nice way to say mean stuff!
  • Find a mentor in the company. If you love the company but hate your boss, this person can be a great sounding board for you, and offer good advice on how to deal with teh hellish boss. Connecting with other people in a discreet way is often quite helpful.
  • Keep a journal of incidences. DO THIS.  If your boss is not the owner of the company, this is even more important. If you have ammunition, documented and dated, you will have a strong case if things get really ugly. Perhaps you may even find yourself in a harassment case, and having everything on paper is key here.
  • If you truly feel your boss can’t or won’t change even after speaking with them and making an effort to reach out, ask for a department transfer. Which leads us to the next point.
  • Don’t sacrifice your health or self esteem. Nothing in life is worth your health or emotional state.  Not a job, not a boyfriend, not a friend, nothing or no one. You gotta take care of number one. If things don’t improve within the company, and you are continuously being attacked and criticised, leave. You have to believe in your abilities.

I wish you good luck in your journey.

And I ask you ladies, can any of you share tips with our readers on how you dealt with a boss from hell? Are you still at the company? Did you leave in the end? We want to know!

xoxEDxox

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13 Responses to “Dealing With the “Boss from Hell””

  1. [...] the team, and then have a candid discussion about the situation and the solutions—without fear.  Failing leaders don’t ask; they tell.  They need to make someone wrong to be [...]

  2. linda says:

    I love my work,My boss is the head of his biz.love his wife too ,He is just always thinking i’m STEALING things from him,cash .cigs.ect. just need to destress .VERY LONG BULL HEAD STRONG EVERY THING I DO IS WRONG MAKES ME STAY LATE (EVEN WHEN I DON’T GET O/T )ASK BE FOR THEY LEAVE OUT THE DOOR-I JUST MAY SAY YES!!!! LAST MIN ON HR. CHANGES . NO THANKS,PLEASE,ECT . TELLS ME I GIVE HIM STRESS-IF I GIVE HIM SO MUCH STRESS THEN LET ME GO!!!!

  3. [...] in life, business, or love. Anyone struggling to move beyond a challenge (like dealing with the boss from hell or just trying to juggle it all) will find inspiration on her blog, which was also rated a Forbes [...]

  4. [...] may be easier said than done, but make the effort today. Make today the day where you look at the job you may hate, and think, at least I HAVE A JOB. Look at your kids who may fluster you sometimes, and think, I [...]

  5. [...] job or career is simply a means to an end- to put food on the table or to provide a roof over your head. [...]

  6. [...] my esteemed colleagues. Throughout the course of my career I have worked with all types; some so toxic, insecure and emotionally unstable that they border the line of lunacy, while others were so [...]

  7. [...] this way, I think you haven’t yet unlocked your passion. Maybe you’re currently in a job you hate and are thinking of taking the plunge into entrepreneurship. Maybe you’ve wanted to go to [...]

  8. [...] you’re prepared, it helps you go the distance. If you sense things are bad at your office, you shouldn’t be shocked when you get your two-weeks-notice and are asked to clean up your [...]

  9. [...] remember all too well, my two old bosses. They were definitely work spouses. This was the neglige and sherry boss and her male boss.  Completing each other’s sentences, knowing how the other liked their [...]

  10. [...] someone who might feel lonely or bored being alone, take the time! While you’re at work, go for a walk alone on your lunch time. If you’re a stay at home mom, read a book on your [...]

  11. [...] as you decide if you are going to hate the husband who cheated on you, or hate your boss, or despise your friend for betraying your trust, maybe you’ll think twice before carrying [...]

    • OpenNo Gravatar says:

      The same as a Poet or a writer or an Artist.The deisgn strategies come automatically.Once they click they become fashion.In furniture the basic is the same as has been prevelent ages ago.The Tables are not turned against you,chairs still require its four legs (only it has become important politically) and the bed is not a 3 tier system..Things are just added from here and there.The subject matter of an antique piece is just added with a flourish in the modern times.In furniture particularly,it’s a recycle only.What is out of date today comes into vogue after a decade.

  12. I once had a boss who always get on my nerves with his over-bossiness and silly jokes.. (yes, his jokes can be so irritating!!) So what I did was, I quit the job… LOL

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